Saturday, March 13, 2010
I Know
Every encounter with her is a bag on me. As Border Collies, my dogs are a direct reflection of me. She is calling into question my ability to train and control my dogs. It is the same as her walking past me without my dogs and telling me to control myself when I hadn't said or done anything to her, when I was minding my own business. As someone who has spent the majority of her life around dogs, training them, and going to dog school just to properly socialize my dogs, I take hits to my dogs very personally. They are fanstastic dogs. Do they get a little out of line sometimes? Sure, who doesn't? But on the days she attacked my dogs and me, neither one of them was stepping a toe out of line.
After our little rift on Tuesday, I spent ALL DAY Wednesday fuming and having preparatory verbal battles in my head. I told all of my friends and coworkers about what had happened. They were SHOCKED this woman got me to be so verbal, and some of them even offered to go to battle against her with me just for the good of all mankind.
Because I had focused so much energy on her Wednesday, I woke up in a funk Thursday morning. I was blue and I didn't care about much. My good friend J told me I was in an emotional withdrawal, which is quite true. Things that normally make me happy didn't budge my blues. I just didn't have the energy to put into emotions.
Anyway, sorry to talk about her so much, but if you have been following my blog for any length of time, you know that I use this blog as an outlet for stuff like this. It is a therapy and a hope. A hope that the people whom these types of posts are about will somehow come across them and read them. Why don't I just tell them about them or say these things in person? Because I am the epitome of passive aggressive. I don't need to be in anyone's face to let feelings go, I just need an outlet somewhere, and this blog is it for me. Writing about it all seriously makes me feel better. It allows me to get the battle out of my head and off my mind so I can move on.
If you actually read this post, feel free to validate me with a comment. :p
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
A Letter
I want to start out by saying that I feel really bad for you. I realize that your unprovoked and neurotic attacks on me on the walking trail are a direct result of your miserable, lonely, and presumably divorced life. I further want to add that I feel sorry for you in that you seem to honestly believe that this world revolves around you, that you are the center of the universe, and that your demands, wants, and needs must be fulfilled before anyone else's in this world (oh wait, is there anyone else in this world?). I am sure it must be very hard when your grocery shopping is done mainly in the "Meals for One" section, and when you have to buy your mangy, malnourished cocker spaniels O.l R.oy Dinne.r Rou.nds, but that is no reason to take your sad life on anyone else.
I don't understand why you feel the need to take your miserable life out on me, a complete stranger who was minding her own business, walking her dogs with her infant, and trying to enjoy a walk that was much needed for relaxation and therapeutic reasons, and without taking into account what battles I might be fighting in this world. I did nothing to you. I said nothing to you. And in fact, had you not felt the need to be so completely heinous to me, I would have treated you like any other person on that walking trail, which is to say I would have smiled politely and told you hello.
I realize that you have some serious neurosis going on, and I wish that for the sake of all dog owners on that trail that you would seek help. I know a great doctor who can prescribe you some wonderful anti-depressants along with some Xa.nnex (which you can take before hitting the trails), as well as a beyond wonderful psychologist who can help you work through your anger against the world.
I would like you to note, while not screaming over the top of me, that my dogs are very well trained and very well behaved. Had you taken two seconds to take your tunnel vision off of yourself, you would notice that my dogs could care less about you or you sickly looking dogs. They are Border Collies. When they go to "work" (i.e., walks and play fetch), they are focused on ONE thing and ONE THING ONLY, and that is the task at hand. Last time you decided to scream at me at the top of your lungs, my dogs, much like you to us, didn't notice your existence as they lay quietly by my feet waiting for the next ball to be thrown. Why? Because they are trained! I have yet to be told they are anything less than amazing dogs by anyone but you. Should you require it, I am sure I can have literally over 100 people write up letters of recommendation for my dogs and their behavior.
Had you not opened your pie hole tonight, I would have never noticed you on the trail, and would have gone home thinking how blessed I was to not have encountered you. You very obviously did not notice that I was enjoying pointing out all of the duckies to my daughter as my dogs also looked on at them (not you or your mutts). But no, you could not pass by me in silence. Of course not. What would this world be if you didn't ruin someone else's evening? *GASP!* Just as with every single other time we encounter one another, you opened your hole and spewed hateful words at me to provoke yet another fight.
I am not a confrontational person at all. In fact, I am so nonconfrontational I ate lunch in the library my entire 8th grade year to prevent having to fight a couple of girls who had a misunderstanding with a friend of mine and me. The fact that you are so easily able to bring the fight out of me says a lot about you, and it isn't good. In fact, when I tell people of our encounters, they can't believe you got me riled up to the point of shouting back because it isn't in my nature.
I haven't done anything to you, never have, never will, so please, next time we pass each other on the trail, please for the love of God and everything holy, keep your dad-blasted yap shut and let me enjoy my walk in peace!
In closing I would like to share a favorite quote with you that goes something like this, "Be kinder than is necessary to everyone you meet, for we are all fighting our own battles." I'll paint it on something ceramic for you and swing it by.
Sincerely,
Your Fed Up Neighbor
P.S. Yes, I had my friends follow you home and I now know you where live too. Big freakidy woop.
For those of you to whom this letter is not addressed and would like a little back story, see these posts:
Friday, September 18, 2009
Crazy Dog Lady Part 2
The day after my first run in with CDL, I decided to take the dogs and baby out for a walk again. This time Mags was being a little bad, so I decided to leash her shortly into the walk. I have a leash splitter that turns one leash into two, which I was using this night. DH did not join me, but caught up to us shortly after we turned around to head home. A few minutes after we met on the trail, I looked up and saw CDL come around a bend on the trail. I KNEW she wouldn't be able to keep her yap shut. Sure enough, "Oh for pete's sake. Will you please put your dog on a leash?!" I was seriously irritated, and coldly replied, "She IS on a leash." All the while not making eye contact to keep from wanting to lunge at her. She repeated, "Will you PLEASE put your dog on a leash!" I looked up, made eye contact, and raised my voice, "She IS on a leash!!"
DH knew that I had been having a really rough week and interjected to keep me from pummeling CDL. This was the first week I had been to see the shrink, and was before I got my prescription for happy pills. I was totally at rock bottom on this day and had zero emotional capacity to deal with this woman. He politely explained the leash splitter and why Mags wasn't always on a leash. She then began to explain herself by saying her dog didn't like it when other dogs weren't on leashes and it tended to make him misbehave. I bit my tongue and kept walking to keep from telling her SHE was the moron, not her dog. Her dog had no idea how to discern if another dog was on a leash or not, especially if it kept to itself. If her dog was having issues, it was because she was passing her neuroses down the leash to him.
Shortly after getting home I took my dogs out to a green area near our house to play ball and run out some of their excess energy. A few minutes into the game CDL came around the corner and pronounced, "Oh for God's sake! WILL YOU PLEASE PUT YOUR DOGS ON A LEASH!"
DH was not around to save her this time, and I had absolutely had it.
I yelled back that I didn't have a leash, as I was playing ball with my dogs. 6-foot leads are NOT conducive to playing fetch. She then yelled at me and asked how she was supposed to get home. I dunno you moron, by walking down the alleyway 20 feet behind me? At this point I had boiled over. I turned and yelled at her, "If your dog can't behave well enough to go on walks even when he's on a leash, then you need to learn how to be a responsible dog owner and get him trained! The reason my dogs behave is because I have spent thousands of dollars in dog training!"
Of course, she wasn't going down without a fight, and screamed at me the entire time she was walking down the alleyway 20 feet behind me. She told me that I was really nice picking a fight with a neighbor, to which I replied, "Likewise! YOU started this, not me!" Her reply was that she had asked a simple request of me, to which I replied her request was ridiculous. She then threatened to call the pound on me. I told her to go right ahead, and that I would call them right back on her since her dog obviously could not behave and that I was not doing anything wrong.
The entire time we were fighting do you know what my dogs were doing? Laying in the grass next to me, their eyes GLUED to the ball in my hand. They didn't give two figs about her or her stupid dog. Why? BECAUSE MY DOGS ARE WELL TRAINED!
Once she had walked past and shut her yap, I pulled my phone out of the stroller compartment and called DH. I was so angry I was shaking. CDL turned around and glared at me while I called him. She watched me the entire time she was walking down the alley and flipped me the bird just as she went around a corner. I put my hands up in a gesture that implied, "What do you want from me? Grow up."
DH came out right away and was just as pissed off as I was about the whole thing. He said, "I bet Mags and Sades didn't even notice her or her dog, did they?" Nope.
A few days later I was out in the same area playing ball with my dogs. I had turned to talk to my daughter while she was in her stroller and when I looked up CDL was walking down the alleyway right across from us. I quickly looked away and ignored her, but smiled to myself because she had to walk up that alleyway while watching my dogs take turns getting the ball. How many people do you know that have two dogs that take turns playing fetch? While one runs, the other lays down at my feet and waits. I thought to myself, "Ha! Stick that in your back pocket you old bag! Now you've seen my dogs behaving."
We have run into each other a couple times since the incident, but we just ignore each other. I really have no desire to get into another match with her. I didn't want the first one, but I just could not handle a complete stranger feeling like she was entitled to push me around over some neurotic need she had in her head to control everything in her environment.
Thus ends my Crazy Dog Lady story. I hope it brought you as much laughter as it has all of my friends, family, and coworkers. I hope that you do not think ill of me for this incident. I really am a kind and generous person. I just have no patience for rude people.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Sticking In My Craw
- Own a dog and walk said dog unaccompanied by poop bags. Dog poops, owner looks around to see if anyone is watching before running away, leaving their potentially disease-carrying dog poop to be someone else's problem, such as the responsible dog owner's when their dog comes down with giardia (if you don't know what that is, google it; it isn't pretty), or the child who happens to step in it.
IF YOU'RE GOING TO OWN A DOG, CLEAN UP AFTER IT! BE RESPONSIBLE FOR GOD'S SAKE! - Own a dog that does not and cannot behave in public because you are too irresponsible to train and properly socialize said dog.
- Walk an untrained dog while not on a leash, and said dog runs up to my leashed dog and gets up in my dog's face or jumps on me. No, I am not okay with it because I own a dog. No, I do not think it is cute. At all. Please don't expect me to smile and be polite when your irresponsible behavior has interrupted mine and my dog's walk.
Tonight DH and I went out to dinner, and when we returned home, found a pile of dog crap in our yard. Our house just happens to be along the very walking trail Crazy Dog Lady walks her dog on. Coincidence? Maybe. Do I suspect? Yes, very much so. I know she knows where I live, and believe me, it is only a matter of time before I figure out which house in my tiny neighborhood is hers. Even if it wasn't her, I don't feel that I am in any way, shape, or form responsible for an irresponsible dog owner's dog poop left in my yard. So tonight after my shower, I dawned my sandals, went out to the shed to grab the pooper scooper, went out front, scooped up the poop..., and dumped it in the middle of the trail. Its not mine. I won't clean it up. I don't appreciate it being left in my yard where my dogs and children play. When I walk my dogs, you bet your sweet bippy I carry poop bags, and if one of them pops a squat, I clean up after them. IT IS MY RESPONSIBILITY AS A DOG OWNER.
GAH!
All right, so ends my rant. If just one irresponsible dog owner reads this and changes their ways, praise be to Heaven and thank you from the bottom of every responsible dog owner's heart.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Crazy Dog Lady Part 1
Our other pup, on the other hand, is just that. A pup. She just barely turned one this year. The breed is known for being hyperactive for the first 2-3 years, and then they hit a turning point and calm down into very gentle, cuddly dogs. As she is a hyperactive pup, however, we cannot trust her to be off leash on walks. Ever. She would run all over helter skelter and get up in other dogs' faces. She even has a tendency to rile up other dogs while she is on leash just by perking up her ears and acting bulky. Usually DH walks her because she tends to pull, while I push the stroller and keep an eye on our other dog.
That being said, both of my dogs are generally well behaved and well trained. I have trained 8 dogs in my short 30-year life so far. I am no greenie to the arena. I have spent thousands of dollars in dog training and socialization classes for my pups. The thing that brings the most pleasure from strangers is that my dogs actually take turns getting the ball when we play fetch. It is not uncommon for passerby to stop and watch my dogs play fetch.
Now back to the story. We were walking along a windy trail that opens up into a grassy area. At the other end of the grassy area, it closes back down to go through some woods and over a bridge. After which point, the path turns a 90 degree angle off into some more woods. DH and I had just entered the clearing, when up ahead just before the bridge there was a woman with an ill-behaved cocker spaniel. She was at least 100 yards ahead of us. Far enough that I could not see her face. We heard the woman call out, "Are both of your dogs on a leash?"
Perplexed, I didn't know why it would matter. Our older dog was minding her business and walking right next to the stroller. I replied that one of them was. She then asked if I would please put my other dog on a leash. Instantly my hackles were up. My dog wasn't misbehaving in any way, shape or form. Obviously this woman had some kind of neurotic need to control absolutely everything in her environment.
As I am not a confrontational person, I begrudgingly obliged. Once my pup was on a leash, the woman crossed the bridge and disappeared around the corner, with her ill-behaved cocker in tow. I irritatedly asked DH why the hell I had to put my pup on a leash, pointing out that the woman's dog did not behave any differently when my dog was on a leash as opposed to when she wasn't, and that the woman could no longer even see us. He was clearly as irritated as I was and told me to take her off her leash. I did.
We then proceeded to walk across the bridge ourselves and around the corner, across another bridge, and into another clearing that opens up to a duck pond. As soon as we entered the clearing, the woman was standing off to the side of the trail waiting for us. I glared at her, then ignored her, and we continued on our way. We did not see her again that night.
DH and I have lived in this area for over a year now and I have never seen this woman before that night. I have asked a few neighbors if they knew her, but no one does. One of them suggested she might be new to the neighborhood. Another offered to go to battle with me if needed.
Thus ends part 1 of our saga. Stay tuned for part 2 that promises a cat fight in front of neighborhood children....