I would post about this on my primary blog, but as with most things on this blog, I don't want people IRL reading it. This time it is not about me, but one of my best friends. She has entrusted me with a secret, and she doesn't want people to know just yet what is going on. I do want to talk about it, especially in this community, but I need to do so in such a way that no one in our real lives will find it, figure out who I am talking about, and ask her about it.
One of my very dear best friends has recently been diagnosed with MFI. She kind of knew things were up last year when she went of BCP and TTC for a few months with no success. Of course, knowing an infertile always strikes fear in those who are just starting to try and go even 3 months without a BFP. So one day she texted me and asked for the name of my doctor. My heart fell. To be honest, I knew she would have trouble TTC from the moment I met her. (Remember how Ross said I have a bit of a gift myself? I always knew I did, even before he said that.) I had hoped my intuition was wrong, but it wasn't.
That night I went over to her house, ready to let her know what she could expect and to give her a bit of insight into the hell she was walking into. She was instantly on information overload, as we all are when we first embark on this hellish journey. I told her that I was always here for her, and if she ever felt like her head was spinning, to let me know. Ever since then, I have been on her journey with her.
It is so bitter sweet. It is so hard to watch someone I care so very much about go through what I did, knowing full well the repercussions it CAN have on a person's life. But I found comfort in that like me, she is a very positive person, and she refused to let this defeat her. It is sweet because I can be here for and with her every step of the way. She isn't alone like I was. I know it helps her a great deal. I am so glad that everything I went through can now help me help someone I love.
As soon as they were given a diagnosis of MFI, I gave her a copy of Con.cieve magazine that I had picked up while waiting for my sonohystrogram back in February. In it there was an article about IVF clinics around the world that provided services in better clinics than in the US and for a lot less money. One clinic it cited is in Turkey. The package includes the procedure, accommodations, transportation, and medication for $8k. All you have to pay for additionally is airline tickets and food. When DH and I read that, we decided we would go that route if we ever had to do IVF, so we took the magazine. But once my friend said she was looking into IVF, I gave her the magazine.
Their flight is booked for July 10th.
I am so incredibly excited for her. I am so glad I am able to be here for her, to cheer her on, and to make sure she doesn't lose hope.
One night we went on a walk, and I told her about how Ross said I had a gift. She said she knew I did. I told her that I had a really good feeling this IVF was going to work for her. I said I knew it from the moment I gave her the magazine. She said she felt it too. We both cried and hugged for a bit.
Please God, let my intuition be right this time too. My friend will make an awesome mother, and her husband will make an incredible father. You put these two fantastic people on earth to bless the lives of everyone they touch. Help them continue that blessing by providing them with children, children they will raise to be just as wonderful, caring, and compassionate as they are.
I know we all have many women in our lives in this same situation who need our prayers, but if you could, please remember my dear friend in them.
Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts
Monday, June 7, 2010
Monday, March 8, 2010
A Bit of Fun
After all of the seriousness on my blogs lately, I decided it is time to do something a little fun by telling you about some of the funniest days of my past. This was before I met DH and hung out with my best friend, Nate.
As I have said before, Nate and I hung out every single Friday and on the occasional Saturday when he didn't have to work. We always had so much fun together. Even when life just plain sucked, we had each other to cheer us up. One spring we decided to take a trek downtown for a bit of fun with some black and white film. We were kind of goofy, but we always had a blast. So now I give you, Fun in Black and White!
First up we have a picture of a very humiliated, dilapidated bike.
This bike had been chained to the pole just like this for over two years. I don't know if it is still there, but every time Nate and I saw it we would laugh and make jokes. In the winter when the snow fell, this bike frame could be seen sticking up just above the inches of accumulation. Even the thought of this poor thing still makes me laugh. But seriously, could we have taken a more artistic picture? (Doesn't being in black and white automatically make it artistic?)
Next up we have what I liked to call, "The Cal.vin Kli.en Pose." This is a pose in which I try to be serious with a slight smile on my face. What I was looking at, we'll never know.
I mean, look at that gorgeous subject matter. It was such a beautiful spring day, and apparently no jacket was necessary. I sure did love those Do.c Mar.tins too. Those were the best shoes.
Now we have Nate, taking time to stop and smell the blossoms.
What a fantastic picture. How often do you see guy of Nate's caliber stopping to smell the new spring blossoms of a fruitless tree? The answer to that is not very. If I remember correctly, those blossoms either didn't smell, or they stunk. I'm going with the latter just for comedic purposes.
And Finally, I present you with trying to look gorgeous in 80% humidity and a misting rain at Mt. Ver.non in Virginia.
I think my dad took this picture, as Nate was clear on the other side of the country while I was out visiting my sister. In fact, this picture was taken just weeks after I met and hooked up with my DH. Guess who I was thinking about when this one was taken?
I hope you have enjoyed this happy ride down memory lane and that it evoked even a small smile (even if that smile was only in your head).
My next post will most likely be back to everything serious. Until then, enjoy looking at the bike.
As Nate and I always used to say, "We're so cool. I wish we were us."
As I have said before, Nate and I hung out every single Friday and on the occasional Saturday when he didn't have to work. We always had so much fun together. Even when life just plain sucked, we had each other to cheer us up. One spring we decided to take a trek downtown for a bit of fun with some black and white film. We were kind of goofy, but we always had a blast. So now I give you, Fun in Black and White!
First up we have a picture of a very humiliated, dilapidated bike.
This bike had been chained to the pole just like this for over two years. I don't know if it is still there, but every time Nate and I saw it we would laugh and make jokes. In the winter when the snow fell, this bike frame could be seen sticking up just above the inches of accumulation. Even the thought of this poor thing still makes me laugh. But seriously, could we have taken a more artistic picture? (Doesn't being in black and white automatically make it artistic?)
Next up we have what I liked to call, "The Cal.vin Kli.en Pose." This is a pose in which I try to be serious with a slight smile on my face. What I was looking at, we'll never know.
I mean, look at that gorgeous subject matter. It was such a beautiful spring day, and apparently no jacket was necessary. I sure did love those Do.c Mar.tins too. Those were the best shoes.
Now we have Nate, taking time to stop and smell the blossoms.
What a fantastic picture. How often do you see guy of Nate's caliber stopping to smell the new spring blossoms of a fruitless tree? The answer to that is not very. If I remember correctly, those blossoms either didn't smell, or they stunk. I'm going with the latter just for comedic purposes.
And Finally, I present you with trying to look gorgeous in 80% humidity and a misting rain at Mt. Ver.non in Virginia.
I think my dad took this picture, as Nate was clear on the other side of the country while I was out visiting my sister. In fact, this picture was taken just weeks after I met and hooked up with my DH. Guess who I was thinking about when this one was taken?
I hope you have enjoyed this happy ride down memory lane and that it evoked even a small smile (even if that smile was only in your head).
My next post will most likely be back to everything serious. Until then, enjoy looking at the bike.
As Nate and I always used to say, "We're so cool. I wish we were us."
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Head Conversations
Do you ever have conversations with other people in your head? More specifically negative conversations so that if the opportunity arises where you have to go to verbal battle, you are prepared.
Saturday my BF S and I were going shopping and had a conversation about this. She asked if I ever did that and I told her I absolutely did. The biggest reason I do is because I am not a confrontational person, so if the need arises where I need to defend myself, I want to be ready. I want to have my quiver full of insults and sharp words to fling back ready in the exact moment they are needed.
My biggest inner battle is between me and a woman I call "Crazy Dog Lady." I blogged about her twice when I first started this blog because I was in absolute shock that the whole thing had taken place at all, and then proud of myself for sticking up for me and every other dog owner who walks on the trail where I encountered her.
If you want a bit of fun reading, you can read all about "CDL" here (part 1) and here (part 2).
I still have conversation battles in my head with this woman because there is a very real possibility of coming across her every time I set foot outside my house. I swear I have never met anyone like her and hope to never meet anyone like her again.
Do you have head conversations? Or are S and I just that weird?
Saturday my BF S and I were going shopping and had a conversation about this. She asked if I ever did that and I told her I absolutely did. The biggest reason I do is because I am not a confrontational person, so if the need arises where I need to defend myself, I want to be ready. I want to have my quiver full of insults and sharp words to fling back ready in the exact moment they are needed.
My biggest inner battle is between me and a woman I call "Crazy Dog Lady." I blogged about her twice when I first started this blog because I was in absolute shock that the whole thing had taken place at all, and then proud of myself for sticking up for me and every other dog owner who walks on the trail where I encountered her.
If you want a bit of fun reading, you can read all about "CDL" here (part 1) and here (part 2).
I still have conversation battles in my head with this woman because there is a very real possibility of coming across her every time I set foot outside my house. I swear I have never met anyone like her and hope to never meet anyone like her again.
Do you have head conversations? Or are S and I just that weird?
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Rotten Tomatoes
A recent post by Noelle at The Desire of My Heart got me to thinking about all of the people I have wanted to throw rotten tomatoes at during my years of battling infertility. There is one that really sticks out in my mind, and no, I am not talking about my old friend. Although apparently I was not that great at choosing bosom buddies in my youth.
No, no, this friend was worse. The first time I ever saw her, I instantly disliked her (this was back in my more judgemental high school days). I didn't want anything to do with her. I thought she was annoying and stupid. Long story short, we became best friends. I'll leave out most of the details, but she moved away our senior year of high school and we managed to keep touch throughout the years. When we were 23 years old, she moved back on her own. We started hanging out and partying. It was like the old days again.
I told her I was not ready to get married and settle down. I was enjoying the single life too much. As I've mentioned previously, I was a bit of a player. She told me she felt the exact same way. A few months later she met a guy. Three weeks later they were engaged. Two and a half months later they were married. My opinion of her went down like an a-bomb. She had reverted back to being silly and stupid. Apparently she only agreed with me because she was afraid she would never get married. *major eye roll here* So she married the first guy that came along.
Anyhow, she tried to get pregnant for a few months, and the next time I saw her was at a funeral. She was five months pregnant at the time and I was newly married. She sat there and boo-hooed to me about how they had tried for six whole entire months to get pregnant and she had given up when it happened. If I knew what I was in for with my infertility adventures at that time, I would have slapped her silly. I do recall rolling my eyes at her.
About a year and a half later, I was deep in infertility treatments, and she was made aware of this. As most people I knew at the time intended to do when I told them what I was going through, she panicked and decided she needed to start trying to have a baby ASAP to prove she wasn't infertile.
One day she called me out of the blue, crying because she had been trying for three whole months to get pregnant without success. She told me she had made an appointment with a fertility specialist and she was calling to talk to me because she just knew I would understand what she was going through. I didn't. I was angry that she had called to whine to me. I basically told her to stuff it, offered her zero comfort, and gave her a less than half-hearted "good luck" before hanging up with her.
By the time her appointment rolled around, she was two months pregnant. Shocker. I wanted to smack her into next month.
We next talked when I happened to be 10 weeks pregnant. She was all "excited" for me, but when I told her how early I was she told me that I could still miscarry. B****. I thanked her for her concern and told her I had to go.
She recently wrote on my wall on FB to tell me that she is not only pregnant again, but that it is with twins. *add horrible acting where I pretend to jump up and down with glee whilst clapping my hands and bobbing my head from side to side then suddenly stop, give a dirtily look, and flip the bird* Good for you sweetie. Good for you. :
Let me pretend I care.... Nope, can't do it.
At her I throw rotten tomatoes. Many, many tomatoes.
Now tell me if any of you have a story in which you have wished to throw rotten tomatoes at someone so insensitive in your life. Here's your chance to fling a big, juicy, rotting off the vine tomato in the face of someone who deserves it so very much. Fling away friends!
No, no, this friend was worse. The first time I ever saw her, I instantly disliked her (this was back in my more judgemental high school days). I didn't want anything to do with her. I thought she was annoying and stupid. Long story short, we became best friends. I'll leave out most of the details, but she moved away our senior year of high school and we managed to keep touch throughout the years. When we were 23 years old, she moved back on her own. We started hanging out and partying. It was like the old days again.
I told her I was not ready to get married and settle down. I was enjoying the single life too much. As I've mentioned previously, I was a bit of a player. She told me she felt the exact same way. A few months later she met a guy. Three weeks later they were engaged. Two and a half months later they were married. My opinion of her went down like an a-bomb. She had reverted back to being silly and stupid. Apparently she only agreed with me because she was afraid she would never get married. *major eye roll here* So she married the first guy that came along.
Anyhow, she tried to get pregnant for a few months, and the next time I saw her was at a funeral. She was five months pregnant at the time and I was newly married. She sat there and boo-hooed to me about how they had tried for six whole entire months to get pregnant and she had given up when it happened. If I knew what I was in for with my infertility adventures at that time, I would have slapped her silly. I do recall rolling my eyes at her.
About a year and a half later, I was deep in infertility treatments, and she was made aware of this. As most people I knew at the time intended to do when I told them what I was going through, she panicked and decided she needed to start trying to have a baby ASAP to prove she wasn't infertile.
One day she called me out of the blue, crying because she had been trying for three whole months to get pregnant without success. She told me she had made an appointment with a fertility specialist and she was calling to talk to me because she just knew I would understand what she was going through. I didn't. I was angry that she had called to whine to me. I basically told her to stuff it, offered her zero comfort, and gave her a less than half-hearted "good luck" before hanging up with her.
By the time her appointment rolled around, she was two months pregnant. Shocker. I wanted to smack her into next month.
We next talked when I happened to be 10 weeks pregnant. She was all "excited" for me, but when I told her how early I was she told me that I could still miscarry. B****. I thanked her for her concern and told her I had to go.
She recently wrote on my wall on FB to tell me that she is not only pregnant again, but that it is with twins. *add horrible acting where I pretend to jump up and down with glee whilst clapping my hands and bobbing my head from side to side then suddenly stop, give a dirtily look, and flip the bird* Good for you sweetie. Good for you. :
Let me pretend I care.... Nope, can't do it.
At her I throw rotten tomatoes. Many, many tomatoes.
Now tell me if any of you have a story in which you have wished to throw rotten tomatoes at someone so insensitive in your life. Here's your chance to fling a big, juicy, rotting off the vine tomato in the face of someone who deserves it so very much. Fling away friends!
Sunday, November 22, 2009
This is What Friendship is Truly About
This weekend I did something I always wanted to do: I went Christmas shopping with one of my best friends. The part I always wanted to do was shop with a friend who reciprocated my friendship and love for her. I can't even tell you how much I loved it. I was supposed to go shopping with one of my best friends, S, but her uncle died this past week and she had to go to his funeral. I had spent last weekend shopping with my other best friend, A, but asked her if she would come along with me this weekend because S had to back out. She gladly accepted, and was at my house first thing Saturday morning.
We then did another thing I have been wanting to do for a long time and haven't done but once since I moved here: we went to the mall. It was one of the best days ever. A and I have so much in common it is freaky sometimes. We think alike, like all of the same things, share the same mannerisms, etc. We were also in all of the same places at the same time throughout our whole lives, yet never met each other until we moved 1300 miles away from our homes here to Texas and then we met at work. What a very serendipitous start we got off to. Needless to say, we were instant friends the day we met and have been very close ever since.
When we started out shopping that morning, A told me up front she had no money, but came along to keep me company and help pick out my gifts. We ended up stopping at B&BW where she found the perfect gift for her sister. I, of course, offered to lend her the money to buy it, telling her she could even wait until after the holidays to pay me back. It reminded me of the day my old friend refused to loan me .26 cents to help pay for my lunch (.26 CENTS!). I loaned A $50 without batting an eyelash. Its money, and she means more to me than $50. I don't care if she never pays it back.
We spent four hours together on Saturday shopping, going out to lunch (which I happily paid for), and enjoying each other's company. She knows all about my old friend, and we even talked about her that day and I asked her if she thought I should write my old friend a letter, which I will get into in a later post. I told her so many times that day how much I appreciated her and the friendship we have. She feels the same way about me, which is so awesome to me. I didn't want the day to end.
When I am asked if I got anything out of the demise of my old friendship, I absolutely say yes. I learned to choose my closest friends more wisely, and I also gained an greater appreciation for the four (yes, FOUR!) best friends I currently have in my life. They really help make my world go round and I can't imagine life without them. My relationships with these wonderful women help me see what I was missing. I wouldn't trade them for all of the Bs in the world (my old friend's name started with a B [ironic, I know]). I thank God they are all in my life, and that the feelings I have for them are 100% mutual.
We then did another thing I have been wanting to do for a long time and haven't done but once since I moved here: we went to the mall. It was one of the best days ever. A and I have so much in common it is freaky sometimes. We think alike, like all of the same things, share the same mannerisms, etc. We were also in all of the same places at the same time throughout our whole lives, yet never met each other until we moved 1300 miles away from our homes here to Texas and then we met at work. What a very serendipitous start we got off to. Needless to say, we were instant friends the day we met and have been very close ever since.
When we started out shopping that morning, A told me up front she had no money, but came along to keep me company and help pick out my gifts. We ended up stopping at B&BW where she found the perfect gift for her sister. I, of course, offered to lend her the money to buy it, telling her she could even wait until after the holidays to pay me back. It reminded me of the day my old friend refused to loan me .26 cents to help pay for my lunch (.26 CENTS!). I loaned A $50 without batting an eyelash. Its money, and she means more to me than $50. I don't care if she never pays it back.
We spent four hours together on Saturday shopping, going out to lunch (which I happily paid for), and enjoying each other's company. She knows all about my old friend, and we even talked about her that day and I asked her if she thought I should write my old friend a letter, which I will get into in a later post. I told her so many times that day how much I appreciated her and the friendship we have. She feels the same way about me, which is so awesome to me. I didn't want the day to end.
When I am asked if I got anything out of the demise of my old friendship, I absolutely say yes. I learned to choose my closest friends more wisely, and I also gained an greater appreciation for the four (yes, FOUR!) best friends I currently have in my life. They really help make my world go round and I can't imagine life without them. My relationships with these wonderful women help me see what I was missing. I wouldn't trade them for all of the Bs in the world (my old friend's name started with a B [ironic, I know]). I thank God they are all in my life, and that the feelings I have for them are 100% mutual.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
I HEART Fall
I should be upstairs taking a nap right now, since this would be my only chance of the day, but instead, I am here with you, writing about something I love, fall, and sharing some of my all-time favorite memories.
In the years before DH and I met, I had a best friend named Nate. Every single Friday, Nate and I would go out and do something fun together. It was our day. Usually we went to dinner and a movie, hung out downtown, went on a quest for some new music, or went hiking. The latter was our favorite. At the time, I had a little dog named Ruby. She was my first ever Border Collie, and on top of that, she was red. Nate and I loved my dog, and we loved taking her hiking in the mountains near our homes. We have so many wonderful memories of going up into the mountains with Ruby, some that still make us laugh to this day.
Not only did we love hiking, we loved doing it in the fall, and we went as often as we possibly could. Here are a few pictures from some of my favorite hikes. I usually took my camera, and I am so glad I did because I will always have these moments to cherish forever.
Here Nate and Ruby pose for a fantastic picture moment in front of some golden quakies. According to the date on this picture, Nate and I had been friends for about three years at this point. Man we used to have fun. Sometimes I really miss those days.
This is one of my absolute favorite pictures of Ruby and me. It caught in one picture the heart of our relationship. We were both supposed to be looking at the camera, but Ruby reached up to give me a kiss just as the shutter opened. She did this a lot, and the paw always came up when she did. I always loved her kisses, and was always happy to take them. She was my pup.
The scenery was always breath taking. We could have spent hours upon hours in the mountains. We didn't care how cold it was. Light was our only enemy on these gorgeous fall days.
I was occasionally afforded the opportunity to let Ruby off leash. She loved these moments, as it gave her a chance to run through the brush and explore.
Seriously, does it get any more beautiful? In real life the golden trees look as though they are glowing. It is incredible, and there is nothing like it. I really, really miss my mountains, especially at this time of year.
I guess Ruby needed a break. Nate loved taking his turn walking her on our hikes. We took this dog everywhere we possibly could.
I just can't resist sharing these gorgeous pictures. I hope you can't get enough, because I sure can't. I had a hard time eliminating pictures from this post. I wanted to share them all.
Finally, I wanted to share a slightly quirky picture of me in what Nate and I liked to call the swamps. This area reminded us of the movie, LOTR. You can see on my face how happy I was in those days. I was so young and carefree. I valued and looked forward to my time with Nate every weekend. We were never romantic, but we were certainly the best of best friends.
I hope you enjoyed this trip down memory lane with me. I know I will enjoy looking at these pictures all next week at work. :)
In the years before DH and I met, I had a best friend named Nate. Every single Friday, Nate and I would go out and do something fun together. It was our day. Usually we went to dinner and a movie, hung out downtown, went on a quest for some new music, or went hiking. The latter was our favorite. At the time, I had a little dog named Ruby. She was my first ever Border Collie, and on top of that, she was red. Nate and I loved my dog, and we loved taking her hiking in the mountains near our homes. We have so many wonderful memories of going up into the mountains with Ruby, some that still make us laugh to this day.
Not only did we love hiking, we loved doing it in the fall, and we went as often as we possibly could. Here are a few pictures from some of my favorite hikes. I usually took my camera, and I am so glad I did because I will always have these moments to cherish forever.
Here Nate and Ruby pose for a fantastic picture moment in front of some golden quakies. According to the date on this picture, Nate and I had been friends for about three years at this point. Man we used to have fun. Sometimes I really miss those days.
This is one of my absolute favorite pictures of Ruby and me. It caught in one picture the heart of our relationship. We were both supposed to be looking at the camera, but Ruby reached up to give me a kiss just as the shutter opened. She did this a lot, and the paw always came up when she did. I always loved her kisses, and was always happy to take them. She was my pup.
The scenery was always breath taking. We could have spent hours upon hours in the mountains. We didn't care how cold it was. Light was our only enemy on these gorgeous fall days.
I was occasionally afforded the opportunity to let Ruby off leash. She loved these moments, as it gave her a chance to run through the brush and explore.
Seriously, does it get any more beautiful? In real life the golden trees look as though they are glowing. It is incredible, and there is nothing like it. I really, really miss my mountains, especially at this time of year.
I guess Ruby needed a break. Nate loved taking his turn walking her on our hikes. We took this dog everywhere we possibly could.I just can't resist sharing these gorgeous pictures. I hope you can't get enough, because I sure can't. I had a hard time eliminating pictures from this post. I wanted to share them all.Finally, I wanted to share a slightly quirky picture of me in what Nate and I liked to call the swamps. This area reminded us of the movie, LOTR. You can see on my face how happy I was in those days. I was so young and carefree. I valued and looked forward to my time with Nate every weekend. We were never romantic, but we were certainly the best of best friends.I hope you enjoyed this trip down memory lane with me. I know I will enjoy looking at these pictures all next week at work. :)
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