Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Rotten Tomatoes

A recent post by Noelle at The Desire of My Heart got me to thinking about all of the people I have wanted to throw rotten tomatoes at during my years of battling infertility. There is one that really sticks out in my mind, and no, I am not talking about my old friend. Although apparently I was not that great at choosing bosom buddies in my youth.

No, no, this friend was worse. The first time I ever saw her, I instantly disliked her (this was back in my more judgemental high school days). I didn't want anything to do with her. I thought she was annoying and stupid. Long story short, we became best friends. I'll leave out most of the details, but she moved away our senior year of high school and we managed to keep touch throughout the years. When we were 23 years old, she moved back on her own. We started hanging out and partying. It was like the old days again.

I told her I was not ready to get married and settle down. I was enjoying the single life too much. As I've mentioned previously, I was a bit of a player. She told me she felt the exact same way. A few months later she met a guy. Three weeks later they were engaged. Two and a half months later they were married. My opinion of her went down like an a-bomb. She had reverted back to being silly and stupid. Apparently she only agreed with me because she was afraid she would never get married. *major eye roll here* So she married the first guy that came along.

Anyhow, she tried to get pregnant for a few months, and the next time I saw her was at a funeral. She was five months pregnant at the time and I was newly married. She sat there and boo-hooed to me about how they had tried for six whole entire months to get pregnant and she had given up when it happened. If I knew what I was in for with my infertility adventures at that time, I would have slapped her silly. I do recall rolling my eyes at her.

About a year and a half later, I was deep in infertility treatments, and she was made aware of this. As most people I knew at the time intended to do when I told them what I was going through, she panicked and decided she needed to start trying to have a baby ASAP to prove she wasn't infertile.

One day she called me out of the blue, crying because she had been trying for three whole months to get pregnant without success. She told me she had made an appointment with a fertility specialist and she was calling to talk to me because she just knew I would understand what she was going through. I didn't. I was angry that she had called to whine to me. I basically told her to stuff it, offered her zero comfort, and gave her a less than half-hearted "good luck" before hanging up with her.

By the time her appointment rolled around, she was two months pregnant. Shocker. I wanted to smack her into next month.

We next talked when I happened to be 10 weeks pregnant. She was all "excited" for me, but when I told her how early I was she told me that I could still miscarry. B****. I thanked her for her concern and told her I had to go.

She recently wrote on my wall on FB to tell me that she is not only pregnant again, but that it is with twins. *add horrible acting where I pretend to jump up and down with glee whilst clapping my hands and bobbing my head from side to side then suddenly stop, give a dirtily look, and flip the bird* Good for you sweetie. Good for you. :

Let me pretend I care.... Nope, can't do it.

At her I throw rotten tomatoes. Many, many tomatoes.

Now tell me if any of you have a story in which you have wished to throw rotten tomatoes at someone so insensitive in your life. Here's your chance to fling a big, juicy, rotting off the vine tomato in the face of someone who deserves it so very much. Fling away friends!


AnxiousMummyto3 said...

Saige...ugh. Yes there are many. Like close family members who freaked out when a cousin's baby was born and I refused to go to the hospital. "OOOH but what will they think of us...?" etc. Anyway I ended up just calling the cousin to congratulate her, I never went to the hospital. But even placing the call was super tough. Definitely throw some huge tomatoes at your annoying friend!!! May I join you? >:)

Mrs Bee said...

Oh boy do I...

I knew a woman(she worked with me) who was crying on my shoulders after "trying" for 4 months.
She branded herself infertile and started saying things like "Ohhh I know how you feeel" and "Us infertiles, we need to stick together"
She went to the doctor and they told her she was healthy, no problems, and to go back if there was nothing after 9 months of trying.
I wanted to punch her into next year.
Especially as we were coming up to our 5th year TTC.
I may or may not have told her a piece of my mind...
Tell me...HOW in the WORLD could she *know* how I was feeling?

She fell pregnant after her 4th month trying...sent pictures of her ultrasounds to everyone, walked around the office rubbing her belly (she just looked fat) and sighing stupid pregnant sighs.
"Oh Sass...Do you think you could bend over and pick that piece of paper up...I'm pregnant, as you know"
Yes...I knew alright...
Her baby is freeking gorgeous...shame her mothers a twat.
She actually calls herself an Infertility Survivor.

I would dump a million rotten tomatoes at her.
And laugh.
And then perhaps steal her baby, because seriously, no-one deserves an idiot for a parent.

*end rant*

Suzanne said...

Most of the people that I know IRL have been very understanding of my struggles with infertility, but there is one comment that my "friend" made before I even got pregnant. She mentioned that she was concerned that my working part-time and going to school part-time might cause me to have a miscarriage. This was before I even became pregnant and had the miscarriage. Sigh ..... I had one coworker suggest different sexual positions for me to use. Sigh .....

Speaking of facebook, (aka Noelle's post),does anyone know how to block a newsfeed?

Saige said...

Suzanne, I know there is a way, but I don't know how to do it either. There are so many feeds I would like to block. lol Hopefully someone knows how to do it and will tell us.

Noelle said...

Suzanne and Saige,
To block a feed you just go to your newsfeed where a person has posted, and go to the right of it, and a "hide" sign will come up. Click on that, and you can hide them. I'm not much of a techie so those are my non-technical terms!

I want to throw a huge tomato at your "friend." Is it possible to be more obnoxious than that?? I don't think so. I can't believe she posted her news on your wall. It was as she assaulted you. It made my blood boil just reading it. Stay far away from that lady! And now she gets twins??? LIfe is SO unfair.

I have two people who I would like to throw tomatoes at. I skipped my half-sister's shower as it was right after my miscarriage, but I sent her a nice note and a gift. She wrote me the meanest letter ever accusing me of never being pregnant, and told me that she didn't want her child to be exposed to me. (This is a girl who does drugs and can't hold down a job).

The other tomato goes to my evil co-worker who, after my miscarriage, kept rubbing her pregnant belly in front of me EVERY time she saw me. Often she would purposely stick her fingers right on the top and press in. She is evil and jealous and yucky.

I enjoyed reading your post! It made me hate even more! I am sorry that you have to know that lady.

Saige said...

People's behavior is so annoying. I was gobsmacked at all of your stories as well.

Sass - I would totally want to punch that chick every time I saw her. I think I'd be flipping her the bird behind her back constantly.

Suzanne - I totally would have smacked your friend too. What a stupid thing to say.

Noelle, I am gobsmacked at your half-sister. Where she is family, you totally could have gotten away with smacking her into next month. What a wrech!

Suzanne said...

Thanks, Noelle! I was able to figure out how to hide the newsfeeds.

Saige said...

Yay for Noelle's smartness!

P.S. My rotten friend left me another message on FB. Perhaps I'll post about it later. lol

Noelle said...

I want to hear about it! Do tell!

Potters said...

Some times it feels so good to just throw a rotten tomato. I hope you feel better now. I hate when people think they have the same problem as you do and freak out when they really don't.