Today I went to yoga at lunch. As I got into the groove of things, a wave of sadness hit me as I craved my favorite pregnancy meal, Chi.ck-fil-a chicken nuggets, waffle fries, and a chocolate shake with a cherry on top. I was so overcome with grief because I wanted so badly to do that again, and here I was, facing the fact that it might not happen.
Then I got mad.
So I started stretching through the poses harder. I started taking out my sadness and anger in each move. As I did so, my anger turned into fight.
I am taking this bull by the horns, and I am going to run with it.
I am done with this pity party dammit!
I AM going to get pregnant again.
We're going to go through the testing. We're going to get second and third opinions. We're going to find out what we're up against. Then we're going to do the surgery, wait for my body to heal, and then
I WILL BRING ANOTHER CHILD INTO THIS WORLD!
I know what I am up against. I know the risks, and I am willing to take my chances. The chances are higher everything will be fine than not, even if it is a slim margin.
If worst comes to worst, I will end up on bed rest in a hospital so that I can get immediate care if I rupture. My baby will be fine, and I will be fine. I am going to do this.
Aaaannnd, I'm back! *takes a bow*